Before their eyes


The day I tried to cook with the moldy garlic was the day we decided I had to switch to the higher prescription glasses I had been refusing to use the last few years. My old scratched and outdated ones just weren’t doing the job for these extremely myopic eyes. They weren’t helpful enough for quickly seeing the apex of a uterine rupture or getting all the little donkey hairs out of the donkey bite wound.


Thankfully, though, prior to the switch of my glasses, the old glasses were enough to still see the clear blue eyes of my little strawberry blonde boy who just celebrated his first birthday yesterday. His blue eyes gleam and he lets out a little squeal when he catches sight of something he wants to play with, like the bucket of peanuts or the can opener. Toys have little interest for him these days.


But a toy, a very specific toy is just what one little girl wanted. She asked the nurse midwife for a doll. The nurse midwife told me that she herself didn’t have a doll, and she knew I probably wouldn’t have a doll since I only have a son. So the midwife gave the girl a small empty bottle of bleach and when my blue eyes caught her big brown ones, she smiled and cradled the bottle tighter.


Her mother had been hospitalized with us for several weeks on maternity, which had given her daughter ample time to see mamas and babies. The delivery of this mama’s 8th child was at another regional hospital. She wasn’t able to get it out easily, so she said two big men pushed on top of her belly and another pulled the baby out with a vacuum. Then she bled a lot, underwent a curetage and stayed at that hospital several days with an increasingly painful and distended abdomen. Against the other hospital’s instructions, her family took her away and brought her to us. As she hadn’t had a stool or passed gas in the 5 days since delivery, I requested our nurse surgeon to open her belly.


Thankfully, her bowel obstruction had not yet resulted in dead bowel, and after repair of her ruptured uterus, she started on the long road to healing. A few weeks later, I waved goodbye to the mama and her little daughter with the big brown eyes.


A different pair of brown eyes shone bright yellow at me for at least a week on the pediatric ward. His family lives here in town and so knowing them made the boy’s seriously ill state a heavier burden than usual for me. He had malaria, but with persistent hemolysis and hematuria. The father, convinced that quinine was the cause of the hematuria, used a medication purchased from the market. We can’t get any more of our one decent quinine alternative medication, Artesunate, from the government and the ones in the market are stolen from hospitals or fakes. So after a day without the child improving, I implored the family to allow me to use quinine again. He was lethargic, encephalopathic, refusing food and requiring more blood transfusions. One day, the family asked to be transferred to the capital city. I bit my lip and prayed for wisdom to respond. I reasoned with them that the 12+ hour voyage would be too hard on the boy but more so, I honestly did not think he would get a higher level care elsewhere.


The family relented and we persisted with bottle after bottle of glucose/quinine and lactated ringers. Just yesterday I sent him home, eyes less brightly yellow than before and walking/talking. 


I was also burdened looking at another pair of eyes. These ones I viewed nearly every day for just over a month. She had severe scoliosis and deformed non-functional legs. Despite this, however, she was able to conceive a son for her husband. As being barren in this land is such a devastating thing for a woman, this one had redeemed herself by becoming pregnant even in her crippled state. 


Thankfully, the clinic who provided a few prenatal visits referred her here at 37 weeks to await the onset of labor. Nearly every day I checked in on her, and she stared back at me. She always had a peaceful look on her face, but she never really smiled. 


When she first came, I found her to be breech presentation. So we spun that baby and she kept it head down until I induced her at 41 weeks. The induction was progressing great, but she couldn’t get her baby out, so I didn’t give her baby too much time to start crumping and we did a c section. After spending so many weeks seeing those serious brown eyes staring back at mine, I couldn’t bear the thought of handing her a cardboard box with a dead baby in it. Praise the Lord, her 9lb baby came out wailing. Several days later she strapped him on her back, took up her crutches and headed for the exit gate.


Another young lady I took care of at midnight last night was only sniffling and not wailing. Blood tricked down from the laceration on her head into her tear-filled eyes. She was maybe 17, and had been beaten by her husband, or at least the man who made her 2 months pregnant. I couldn’t get many details about what happened or where the husband was. Still though, I pleaded with them to get the police involved, for whatever their help is worth. Her laceration took just a few minutes to sew up. As a full moon was out, I walked back home by only its light and crawled back into bed.



1I have a message from God in my heart

concerning the sinfulness of the wicked:

There is no fear of God

before their eyes.


2In their own eyes they flatter themselves

too much to detect or hate their sin.


9For with you is the fountain of life;

in your light we see light.


from Psalm 36



We stand "before their eyes" here. Dozens and dozens of eyes watch us every day. They watch us frown, watch us laugh, watch us sew their wound or pull out their baby. What do they really see when they see us? Do they see the real reason we are here? Do they see the love we have for them and their Creator? Do they see the "Fountain of light" that will illuminate their eyes?


Comments

  1. God bless you Sarah! And May the people ser His love through your work and life. It is so inspiring to read your blog!

    ReplyDelete
  2. When Jesus comes to take us home , hopefully 🙏 you will see some of them . Stars in your crown 👑 GOD BLESS

    ReplyDelete
  3. May God continue to use you to save lives now and for eternity! Thanks for sharing your experiences!

    ReplyDelete

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